


We Can't Change What Happened

by Dragon_Dweller



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, bagginshield - Fandom, thilbo - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Battle of Five Armies, Braids, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Erebor, Fluff and Angst, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-23
Updated: 2014-02-23
Packaged: 2018-01-13 12:24:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1226146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dragon_Dweller/pseuds/Dragon_Dweller
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Almost a year after the Battle of Five Armies and reclaiming Erebor, Thorin is King, but at a price he never wanted to pay and the grief is more than the King Under The Mountain can bare.</p><p>
  <i>Bilbo is by his side every step of the way.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Can't Change What Happened

**Author's Note:**

> Thinking about why Thorin's beard was so short, in mourn and remembrance for those he's lost, and my muse took a hike around the idea of what Thorin would do after BoFA and losing Fili and Kili as they tried to defend him.

Bilbo rolled over and moved to snuggle against Thorin's side, the cold of their bedchamber closing in around him. But he only snuggled into an equally as cold spot that his lover had occupied earlier. Frowning and sitting up, Bilbo rubbed his sleepy face and looked around the bedchamber for a sign of his Mountain King. He found him nowhere, finally turning his head towards the bathroom, leaning back some to spy in through the mirror above the sink. He saw Thorin there, his hands braced on the sink counter and looking at himself in the mirror, he looked... _terrible_. The Battle of Five Armies had only been over nearly a year and Thorin was still healing from his various wounds, but one wound Bilbo knew Thorin would never heal from was the loss of his beloved and treasured nephews, Fili and Kili. They had died defending him, when he fell to the onslaught of the enemy and his life threatening wounds. Bilbo had begged and pleaded with Balin and Dwalin for days and days, to let him tell Thorin about the boys' death when he did finally wake from his unconscious state.

Finally, when Thorin did wake and his first question, his first words were about his nephews. Bilbo made everyone leave the bedchamber so it was just him and the Dwarf and sat beside him, holding his hand tightly in his own. He had to consciously force himself to look Thorin in the eyes and keep his own tears from coming up and showing, he'd fallen in love with Fili and Kili like they were his own nephews, his own sons, their deaths still tormented him in every waking and sleeping moment since they'd fallen and now that torment would amplify having to tell Thorin the news and see the Dwarf he loved more than all things, crushed under the grief and agony of it.

-

“I'm sorry, Thorin.” he had whispered, his voice able to go no higher or it would have broken and he would have sobbed. “They are...” he couldn't say it, he dropped his eyes from Thorin's.

“Bilbo, where are my nephews!?” Thorin demanded, pushing himself up despite the excruciating pain of his body. “Where are Fili and Kili!?” he shook with desperation and anxiety, the hand holding Bilbo’s squeezing tighter and his other hand grabbing the side of the Hobbit's face, making him look at him again. “Where's my Fili and Kili?” Thorin had whispered in a weak, tear stained voice.

“They're gone, Thorin.” Bilbo whispered back, a tight and painful lump in his throat. “They died defending you as you laid out from your wounds on the battlefield.”

“No!” Thorin had roared, grabbing Bilbo by the shoulders and shaking him violently, his eyes clouded over with tears. “You lie! You're lying, traitorous dog!”

Bilbo squeezed his eyes shut, tears slipping through them as he let Thorin shake him and yell at him, having a quick flashback to being on top of the wall when Thorin found out he'd given the Arkenstone to the Elves and Men, but it wasn't more than a second before he felt Thorin press his face into his shirt, his hands falling lifelessly from his shoulders as the mighty King sobbed over the loss of his nephews, not just his nephews, his sons. His Princes. His Heirs and Lifelines.

-

Bilbo was pulled out of the memories by the flash of something shiny in Thorin's hand. His eyes got wide as plates watching the object, a knife, go to Thorin's second longest braid, the first that showed he was royalty and a king, horror shot through the Hobbit.

“Thorin!” he screamed, shooting out of bed and into the bathroom.

By the time Bilbo reached Thorin, yanking the knife out of his hand and throwing it away, the Dwarf had cut the braid free, the metal bead at the end clinked against the stone sink counter as it fell there. Bilbo's chest heaved and he panted, horrified and confused. Thorin just stared at him with a hard face and empty eyes.

“Thorin.” Bilbo whispered his name softly, his hand squeezing Thorin's bicep gently. He wanted to ask what was wrong with him, but he already knew what it was sending him over the edge.

Thorin's face contorted and tears overflowed as he dropped to his knees, wrapping his arms securely around Bilbo's waist and pressing his face into the Hobbit's torso. Bilbo choked slightly on his own tears, kissing the top of Thorin's head and soothing his hands through his hair, whispering soft and comforting words to him. He managed to coax the spent King back to bed and tucked him in before going back into the bathroom. Picking up the cut braid, Bilbo looked at the bead and frowned, it was the braid Thorin had started at the very beginning of the quest to reclaim Erebor, he remembered watching Thorin sit quietly at his dining table, while the others where in the living room talking, and started the braid, he had worked on the bead after the quest was finished. Rubbing the soft braid with his thumb, Bilbo went back out to their bedroom, going into the large chest at the foot of their bed and taking out a small wooden box from inside, it was Bilbo's memory box, he had things in there he wanted to remember and keep safe. Coiling the braid, Bilbo carefully laid it inside, staring at it a time before putting everything back in its place and laid back down with Thorin. He let Thorin wrap around him and bury his face into his shoulder, bring them both comfort in the painful time for a little bit.


End file.
